Friday, September 25, 2009

What if?

So, there are basically four-ish weeks left before our swift departure. As these weeks draw quickly to a close, I have begun to think. A lot. About everything and anything past, present, and especially future. While I have the next year planned out, everything beyond that is a mystery. The one constant thought is "What if...". What if I get scared? Sad? Homesick? What if I love it? What if I hate it?

What if I regret it?

That has to be the scariest question that I have. I constantly remind myself to regret nothing, but to appreciate each experience. Bad or good, every experience in my life has made me who I am. I have to have this experience not just to prove to myself I can do it, but also because it is going to fill a huge void in my spirit. I have been incessantly restless for longer than I care to remember. So as soon as I begin to think "What if I just stayed here and settled down?" I have to remember that without this life experience, I'll never be able to settle. I will always be longing for that missing piece.

On a different note, all our paperwork is with the Korean Consulate in Seattle. This is truly the last step in what seemed to be a never ending flow of paperwork, emails, phone calls and costs that have added up. Once we recieve our visas, we will have a departure date. We had our vaccinations done today, and my arm is quite sore, as is my wallet...but it is totally worth it of course!

Currently listening to: Gravity, Alison Krauss and Union Station

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